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‘Crack made butterflies dance in my mind’ – the hidden stories behind survivors’ tattoos | Art and design

October 31, 2020
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‘Crack made butterflies dance in my mind’ – the hidden stories behind survivors’ tattoos | Art and design
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‘I was a blackout drinker, and through the years my blackouts turned longer and extra adventurous,” says Scott Lavene. “I went out in Edinburgh as soon as and awakened in Cambridge with £500 that positively was not mine.” He’s sitting in a caravan with a cup of tea, explaining why he has the phrase “stray” tattooed on his shoulder.

The dictionary definition of stray is an animal with out a house, he says, and that was what his ingesting made him. Now a musician and performer, with a document label supporting him, Lavene has additionally co-created the primary movie put collectively by the Outsiders Venture, a writing and performing collective of people that, like him, have hauled themselves out of lives of dependancy, crime and exploitation.





‘A stray is an animal without a home’ ... Scott Lavene in his caravan.



‘A stray is an animal with out a house’ … Scott Lavene in his caravan. {Photograph}: The Outsiders Venture

The 16-minute video is a part of a project about the autobiography of tattoos, which was simply getting below method when the Covid-19 outbreak started. The purpose was to create a play primarily based on the tales individuals advised concerning the artworks they’d inked into their our bodies. Individuals like Gail, whose arm bears a tattooed floral necklace strung collectively by the names of her 4 youngsters, who have been taken into care; and Jane, whose butterflies recall each the miraculous flutterings of being pregnant and the darkish enchantment of dependancy. (“The primary time I put a crack pipe in my mouth, the butterflies danced in my thoughts.”)

The Outsiders Venture relies in a disused division retailer in Boscombe, a suburb of Bournemouth, the place a lot of the outsiders had initially gone to test into considered one of its many rehab centres. However ambitions for the present – the challenge’s third – are something however parochial. By the point lockdown introduced their ambitions crashing down, they’d Theatre Royal Plymouth, Hampstead theatre in London and Cornwall’s Kneehigh theatre lined up as inventive companions.

As a substitute of giving up, the Outsiders did what ex-addicts know the way to do higher than anybody: they picked themselves up, dusted themselves off – and determined to go international. Inside two days, a website had been set as much as collect testimonies from anybody with a narrative to inform. It now options greater than 60 tales from as far afield as New Zealand, with extra coming in by the day.

Some tales are submitted in writing and others are collected from oral accounts. If needed, they’re translated, and the method at all times entails collaborative modifying quite than rewriting, explains founder Nell Leyshon. “The entire level is that these are unheard voices.”




‘I will never return to the darkness’ … anorexia-survivor Leah.

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‘I’ll by no means return to the darkness’ … anorexia-survivor Leah. {Photograph}: the Outsiders Venture

Leyshon is playwright and director, who was impressed to arrange the Outsiders Venture by the individuals she met whereas working inventive writing workshops in Boscombe. A lot to her shock, she discovered she had her personal story to inform. “Once I began the tattoo challenge, individuals stored asking once I was going to get a tattoo. I laughed and mentioned by no means,” she says. “However yesterday I remembered I do have three tattoos. They’re tiny black dots used to line up the radiotherapy machine.”

The tattoo’s position as a memorial of sickness – in Leyshon’s case, breast most cancers – is a recurring theme. American participant Leah selected a posy of flowers to mark her restoration from anorexia; the intense orange ribbon of Debbie’s “survivor” tattoo speaks of a childhood misplaced, of “blood and bandages, confusion and chaos … They mentioned I might reside for six months. I used to be 10 years previous.”

The tattoo additionally has a historic place in people tradition. “Two swallows on the within of my thighs. Dealing with one another,” writes a second man referred to as Scott. “Sailors used to get them after they’d go on ships a whole lot of years in the past. They believed that in case you have been out at sea and drowned, swallows would carry your soul as much as heaven.” Ben, in the meantime, inked himself with a reproduction of a portrait worn by his father, who spent his youth within the French International Legion, evoking a historical past of troubled younger males endlessly marked as renegades. “At first, he advised me don’t get this tattoo as a result of persons are going to assume you’re a legionnaire and it will possibly convey you bother.”


The topic of transformation is frequent, with photos marking a restoration from, or a reconciliation with, dying or illness

Although a lot of the tales inform of trauma, additionally they showcase the wit and resilience of the survivor. New Zealander Jimmy has the identify “Cazale” on his arm in reminiscence of the Hollywood actor John Cazale, who died after making 5 Oscar-nominated movies, together with The Godfather Half II and The Deer Hunter. It’s a tribute to somebody whom no one actually remembers, he writes. However it’s not only a identify. “It’s a complete set of values, reminiscences, ambitions, aspirations.”

The topic of transformation makes a frequent look, whether or not in photos marking a restoration from, or a reconciliation with, dying or illness, or within the bodily act of inking over a shoddy design, a foul reminiscence, with a greater one. In these arms, tattooing is an optimistic artwork kind, by which the physique mirrors the thoughts as a piece in progress.

Generally the tales are mini operas which, in Beckettian fashion, have you ever laughing wildly amid severest woe. And none extra so than Beth’s bittersweet account of the Chinese language image she had inked into her physique, paid for along with her garbage wages from a dead-end job, believing that it meant “energy”. Years later, she writes, she was cleansing up with a Chinese language fellow intercourse employee. “As we showered collectively after the shopper had gone, she checked out my tattoo and laughed. She mentioned, ‘Why do you might have little donkey written in your stomach?’”



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