REBECCA: Hey everybody, that is Talon Marks Multimedia editor.
REBECCA: On this podcast, I’m describing my shallowness or self-image and my tattoos. I don’t actually know the place to start however I assume sick begin with myself and the time it took to lastly get my first huge tattoo.
REBECCA: I grew up in a small household the place something you probably did, principally the complete household knew. Tattoos are a bit taboo in my household however I feel that’s been form of going away just lately since my artwork on my physique appears to develop every year. In order a child I felt that getting tattoos was positively out of the query rising up which made me really feel hopeless about ever feeling good about myself. I might all the time draw on myself with pens markers, something that was a ballpoint pen, I drew on myself. After all, my mother would hate it and id get punished or she would scold me that tattoos aren’t ladylike in a way. However the factor is, I had already seen stunning ladies who’ve tattoos so it will throw me guard as to what was lady-like and never.
REBECCA: As time went on, I gained weight and wasn’t the prettiest. I positively wasn’t pleased with myself and nonetheless stored wanting tattoos though I used to be solely a freshman in highschool. Like if my mother was actually going to let a 14-year-old with a crappy tattoo stroll round campus. Anyway, I joined shade guard and did that all through excessive school- misplaced some weight and at last had some braces slapped on my enamel. I form of felt good about myself in a approach, I assume.
REBECCA: As soon as I graduated highschool I knew it was lastly round that point to begin excited about what I needed on my physique that was doubtlessly going to be on my pores and skin for my family and friends to see eternally. I wanted to decide on between me wanting a tattoo to me taking the time to get the proper one. I grew out of my child mindset about having one thing cartoony and went into extra of a cultural illustration in addition to tributes and representations of my household and the issues I preserve so close to and pricey to my coronary heart.
REBECCA: At one level in my life, I fell into melancholy and gained a little bit of weight once more. I believed I used to be by no means going to have the ability to get a tattoo since my pores and skin was stretched out and I had stretch marks. I needed tattoos in locations the place I believed I had the arrogance to indicate off however ended up feeling brief simply due to all of the adverse suggestions about being a plus measurement lady and having tattoos in revealing locations. My confidence was slowly dimming out and I simply didn’t really feel like I liked myself.
REBECCA: I made a decision that for my twenty first birthday I lastly needed a tattoo that represented my tradition. I ended up getting an enormous portrait of the Goddess Xochiqueztal in Aztec Mythology which took about three 5-hour periods to totally full. As soon as completed, I noticed that to ensure that my flaunt my tattoo, I wanted to put on issues that present my legs. I’m very self-conscious of my legs and knew that if I needed to strut my stuff, I wanted so as to add effort into me maintaining a healthy diet, discovering new train habits, and most significantly studying tips on how to love myself no matter my weight.
REBECCA: After that, I began my journey of engaged on my self-image and the way I wanted to understand myself usually. I do know all of us have our kinks as to what makes us really feel good, however critically consider that my tattoos gave me a lift of motivation to work on my weight and with the ability to exhibit my tattoos with out having the concern of getting individuals say dangerous issues.
REBECCA: I feel this complete tattoo journey has given me a way of reduction and a little bit of a transparent picture of who I’m purported to be.