Cracked Investigates: Has Vladimir Putin Even Read/Watched 'Harry Potter'?

It is not fully exterior the realm of chance that Putin might need the same shelf with well-loved copies of each Harry Potter online game, together with the early Recreation Boy ones, elsewhere in his house. There isn’t a exhausting proof to refute the notion of Putin having already pre-ordered the subsequent one for the Xbox Sequence X at his native recreation retailer. We can’t conclusively rule out the prospect that Vladimir Putin received indignant, and even somewhat bit teary-eyed, after studying a “SNAPE KILLS DUMBLEDORE” spoiler whereas looking ebaumsworld.com in 2005. The Deathly Hallows tattoo on Putin’s decrease again space exists in a state of quantum superposition, neither proved nor disproved.

However, evidently when Putin likened himself to Rowling, he did not foresee the truth that his potential favourite creator would not like him again:

Even a quick glance at the Wikipedia page for the Harry Potter books, a series about wizards stopping a fascist uprising, would have revealed that Rowling’s work doesn’t quite line up with Putin’s values. So we must conclude that Putin is not that familiar with the series and has probably never ridden a single Harry Potter-themed roller coaster at Universal Studios. Putin has, in all likelihood, never bought a mug of each House at the gift shop after the ride because gosh, they’re all just so great. Vladimir Putin probably doesn’t even know what his Patronus is (or what that word means).

Anyway, hopefully being endorsed by a world leader currently bombing civilians in another country will make Rowling rethink some of her positions regarding “cancel culture,” but if Neo-Nazis, anti-democratic insurrectionists, climate change denialist conservative think tanks, and naturally, hundreds of violent bigots did not do the trick, we’re not holding our breath.

Comply with Maxwell Yezpitelok‘s heroic effort to learn and touch upon each ’90s Superman comedian at Superman86to99.tumblr.com.